to commit or not to commit? | Love the One You're With

book: Love the One You're With | Emily Giffin

books:


	• Love the One You're With Emily Giffin St. Martin's Press, 2008 - 342 pages average customer review:based on 258 reviews view larger image
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highly recommended

Recommended

First time reading this author and I was pleasantly surprised. While this is not an overly ambitious story, what it does explore it explores quite well. I enjoyed being inside the narrator's head as she faced down her dilemma and found her confusion and guilt very real and convincing. In fact, I found myself pausing often while reading to think about what I would do in her situation. Which tells me that I was very much invested in the story...always the sign of a good book. The author has a very clean and effortless writing style, which is perfect for this type of book. All in all, just a very enjoyable read.

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to commit or not to commit?

i don't think this is so much a love story as it is a story about what it takes to commit your life to someone else. since over half the marriages in this country end in divorce, it is obviously a lesson that is really hard to learn. that is what i thought this book was about, about whether ellen could learn what it means to commit to her husband and whether she thought she could actually do it once her feelings for leo resurfaced. i like how this book doesn't play out like some unrealistic fairy tale, where all of your troubles disappear once you say "i do." i mean, it is not realistic to think that you are not going to ever be tempted throughout the course of your marriage or that you won't possibly think or even have feelings for someone else. that's just how life works sometimes, whether we like it or not. yes, ellen makes some really stupid decisions throughout this book, but i couldn't blame her for doing the things she did. she thought she was following her heart. she was confused. she didn't want to live a lie if she was truly in love with someone else. or, more importantly, if she realized that maybe she didn't love her husband and had made a mistake. i thought her reasoning for making her final decision was pretty right on: that commitment means you have to make the choice every day, over and over again, to be with a person in order to make it work. but is she willing to do it? i guess it's not ideal or perfect or overly romantic, but it's honest. commitment is hard work, there is no doubt about it. and this book makes you understand that.

and im surprised at the reviewers who thought leo was such a jerk. okay, he was kind of a jerk when he was younger but i thought he was incredibly charming when ellen runs into him again. i could certainly see why ellen was so into him. i thought he and suzanne were the most interesting characters in the story, actually.

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